Michael Martin

‘Brown’ Sugar, and other euphemisms.

March 9, 2010

Southern voters might be surprised to learn that the Labour heartlands are not the romanticised ‘green valleys’  surrounding the far from romantic pit villages of the Rhonda Valley that the wind-bag Neil Kinnock liked to promote as the seat of Labour Power. Nor are they the teeming back alleys of Liverpool surrounding the now redundant [...]

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Re-definitions – Nu-Labour speak; Issue 4

September 23, 2009

Noun. A Peer – Oxford English Dictionary definition. 1 A nobleman. 2 A man who holds a peerage by descent or appointment. Noun. A Peer – Nu-Labour definition. 1 A man or woman elevated to the peerage by their Nu-Labour cronies. 2 A Woman who a-peers to break the law when in fact only ‘in [...]

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A Garbled Statement from Gorbals Mick

May 18, 2009
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‘Gorbals Mick’ has spoken – if his garbled speech can be graced by such a term. He has not offered to resign. Douglas Carswell’s motion is not a ‘substantive motion’ .  He has refused a debate.  David Davis has asked that it be transformed from an early day motion to a substantive order. Mr Speaker [...]

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Foot and ‘Mouth’ disease.

May 17, 2009
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The present outbreak of the disease which threatens to cull all the livestock in the House of Commons can be traced back to 1976 and Michael Foot’s cowardice in the face of a pincer movement – a deputation of MPs unable to live on the pittance that was allocated to them and a concurrent acrimonious [...]

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Re-definitions – Nu-Labour speak; Issue 3.

May 15, 2009
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‘I support the ‘office’ of the Speaker’ – I’m too frightened of the whips to say so openly, but I wish someone braver than me would boot Michael Martin out – he got us into this mess. ‘I am repaying the money’ – Actually I’m putting it back in the Fees Office trough I got [...]

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