The Tantalisingly Tantric Cameron!

by Anna Raccoon on January 20, 2013

When it comes to getting screwed by our present Prime Minister we have to be patient.

No Gordon Brown style wham-bam-thank-you Ma’am.

First he graciously teased us with a ‘I might tell some Dutch academics on Friday’,

Then it was a ‘Hang on a minute, Algeria’s put me right off my stroke’,

Come Sunday, we were still lying back and thinking of England, and he announces via William Hague, that he might tell us on Monday,

Or tell someone, probably a delegation of Korean miners,

Whether at some point,

He might possibly consult the British,

But only those British who are still in the UK or returning within 15 years,

As to whether he intends to give the British a chance to say that they want to stay in the EU – but he definitely won’t give them a chance to say that they want to get out.

He’s already leaked that bit of his speech to Reuters.

He’s threatening to go on like this for another five years.

I’m losing the will to live.

For God’s sake, pull out, let’s get it over with.

{ 18 comments }

Mudplugger January 20, 2013 at 15:49

“For God’s sake, pull out, let’s get it over with.” – now where did I hear that recently ?

Anna Raccoon January 20, 2013 at 15:52

Last night, your house, close to home…

Mudplugger January 20, 2013 at 20:34

You were listening again !

GildasTheMonk January 21, 2013 at 12:53

That brings back some distant memories…

Bob Bird January 20, 2013 at 16:02

Yet another case of Cameronius Interruptus …

Mike January 20, 2013 at 16:12

Ah yea, I remember those wet weekends when the chemists were shut and there was bugger all on the telly.

Joe Public January 20, 2013 at 16:15

Or as someone would say to a latter-day Pierrepoint:

“For Gods sake, pull the lever, and get it over with.”

Engineer January 20, 2013 at 16:40

Pompous opposition front bench spokesman at the Dispatch box, “This is the politics of coitus interruptus!”
Gleeful cries from government benches, “Withdraw! Withdraw!”.

That’s enshrined somewhere in Hansard, apparently.

Matt Wardman January 20, 2013 at 17:48

Willie Hamilton, no less

“If hon. Members remember, the proposal then was whether to join the EC. Big chunks on the Opposition side were against it and big chunks were for it. It was the same on this side. Willie Hamilton, in exasperation, stood up and said, “This is crazy. This is absolute chaos. This is not the politics of Europe. It is the politics of coitus interruptus.” A little voice shouted, “Withdraw!”. If they know what is good for them, some Members of the House of Lords down the Corridor will withdraw to their rolling acres for good.”

c777 January 20, 2013 at 17:57

I suspect events may intervene, the EU is in a mess, Germany is shortly going to have to put more money into Greece, their exports are slowing, the list goes on.
However.
If Cameron reneges on an in out referendum again he’s toast, as well as the whole Conservative party.
And he knows it.
Fascinating scenario.
We could see the UKIP breakthrough soon.

right_writes January 21, 2013 at 08:42

‘Course, what’s missing from British politics is a decent conservative party and a decent “classical” liberal party.

The current CONservative has the potential to become the former, but I fear that the social democrats are so firmly in control that any conservatives left there are going to have a torrid time. UKIP is basically a liberal party, one of the reasons that the establishment hates it so much, so much liberal policy calls for the removal of the state that unemployed civil servants will make unemployed miners look like a Thatcher tea party.

Some of the more intelligent conservatives may well join, or remain in UKIP, but I do not accept that conservative voters are suddenly going to start voting UKIP… Their votes are going to come from the increasing amounts of voters that have had a barrelful of “big” government and had enough of it.

It would be interesting to see what twats like Cameron would make of a genuine conservative/liberal coalition.

cascadian January 20, 2013 at 18:48

When all is said and done.
More will be said than done.

Words to live by.

Though in this case the Camoron cannot even rouse himself to platitudes.

Frankie January 20, 2013 at 19:46

The image conjured up by Anna of ‘Snake Hips’ Cameron all “giving us one” over the vexed question of Europe is an evocative one.

Unfortunately, I think that all of us who have been shouting “It hurts, pull out” will have to wait a long time before we get the chance to lie back, exhausted, thoroughly buggered and resentful as hell.

Ed P January 20, 2013 at 20:10

Yes, withdraw – there’s nowt else to do when you’ve made such a cock-up.

GildasTheMonk January 20, 2013 at 21:49

Words I have heard so often. Along with:
“Are you done now?”
“Is that it?”
“Have you started?”
“It is cash only, petal”
“I knew I should have taken my mother’s advice”

Dick the Prick January 20, 2013 at 23:06

This looks suspiciously like a horse’s willy. Oh, sorry, wrong thread.

Thor2Hammer January 21, 2013 at 08:41

“Gordon Brown style wham-bam-thank-you Ma’am.” Is there any recorded instance of his saying the last three words?

John Galt January 21, 2013 at 09:32

Don’t worry, the election in 2015 will put Mr. Cameron out of his misery as well as returning Labour to power to put the last nails in the coffin.

While I can see UKIP making a breakthrough in terms of electoral support exceeding the Limp Dims, I can’t see a single UKIP candidate getting elected as the first-past-the-post rules for Westminster make that effectively impossible. I can however visualize the Limp Dims being cast into the outer darkness of political irrelevance, they have been playing on the “if only we can get into a power sharing coalition…” card for decades and have proven the fruitlessness of their position when this actually happens.

I wouldn’t be surprised to see a further splintering of the Tory party after their rejection at the polls in 2015, bring forward another clone of Tony Blair is only likely to exacerbate their future un-electability. Expect to see voter participation continue to decline as the electorate become more and more disengaged from the meaningless squabbling of the elite in Westminster.

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