It’s an iniquitous thing to be
A two-Jag own-ing Labour man like me,
(Chauffer-driven 20 yards in case of showers)
While the Red Flag flies aloft at Prescott Towers!
Such a notorious bloke as me
Deserves to get his toilet-seats for free
After breaking one or two at Prescott Towers
While sitting on the lavat’ry for hours and hours!
Grunt! Strain! Number 2, Number 3
Try as you might, you can’t flush me!
Grunt! Strain! Number 2, Number 3
Try as you might, you can’t flush me!
Don’t charge me with hypo-crisy,
I’m as Labour as any man could be;
I’ve never shied away from crossing swords
And I’ve always said there shouldn’t be a House of Lords!
I’ve spoken out with integ-ri-ty:
“Baron Prescott? Oh, no, that won’t be me!”
“Stuff your Peerage!” (and I said it in a trice),
Until, of course, dear Pauline said, “It would be nice…”
Bam! Pow! I’m on TV! Channel 3!
See me punch a man who threw some eggs at me!
Bam! Pow! I’m on TV! Channel 3!
See me punch a man who threw some eggs at me!
Oh what a glorious thing to be
A highly-feted Labour Lord like me!
Basking in the glory of my former powers
And dozing in the House of Lords for hours and hours!
It’s nice to be a Labour Lord like me,
Being just as Labour-like as I can be;
Being more important than I have ever been
And snoozing next to Mandleson! God Save The Queen!
Zzzz, Zzzz, Until it’s tea, let me be,
Vote if you like but don’t wake me!
Zzzz, Zzz, Until it’s tea, let me be,
Vote if you like but don’t wake me!
Verse and Worse – the drawing too! ©Gloria Smudd
The swivel eyed, snaggle toothed, progenitor of an altogether superior brood of Smudletts. An uncommon wit that fails to grace these pages often enough.
{ 6 comments }
Made oi larf. Sublime!
Bee-yond praise, Ms Smudd! You are truly a queen among parodists.
Jus’ waxing lyrical, you know …
He is the very model of a modern Labour Grasp-it-all…
Gloria, I think I’ve got your number
I think your words are scarier
Than the pic you’re writing under…
I didn’t mean it Gloria – love you really!
Thank you Gloria. I have sent it around my little circle of e-molers (sic)
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